Mum adjusted the same piece of cutlery for the fifth time.
‘It’s going to go smoothly, Mum,’ I said, placing a warm hand on her back.
‘It’s a big deal, meeting all my future daughters-in-law, all at once.’ Mum was referring to my older brother Charleston, who had recently proposed to his fourth and final fiancée. Tonight was a celebration - all his fiancées would be introduced to the family at the same time. The doorbell rang, startling poor Mum.
‘Get everyone seated! Quick!’ She barked the orders and I obeyed. I giggled to myself. It’s showtime.
On the table sat Mum, Dad, Gran, Grandpa and myself. There was an empty spot for Charleston with two more empty chairs on either side. In walked my brother, his arms buoyant in the air as he soaked up the applause. Behind him were four women, all of differing ages. I quickly took a stab at which wife would be for which category.
‘Family, it is my pleasure to introduce, and in no particular order: Clarissa Obyen, my Wife of Finance! Clarissa works as CEO of an international trade company.’
Clarissa took a seat next to Grandpa, her excessive jewellery clinking on every plate and piece of cutlery around her.
‘Next up, Jennifer Stargaze, my Wife of Fame!’ I recognised Jennifer straight away, I’d seen her in the latest Bond trailer. How my brother had met her, I had no clue.
‘Following Jennifer, we have Amanda Liebersing, my Wife of Politics. Dad, I was hoping we could set up a meeting with Amanda’s father later this week to discuss this allegiance further?’ Urgh, politics are so dull. Land for this, money for that.
‘And finally, a woman who needs no introduction. Elizabeth Trupontè, my Wife of Genetics!’ Both Liz and Charles had attended university together. She was the kind of student everyone knew, the type that was naturally gifted, always won awards for this and that blah, blah. She had lush, curly auburn hair, which I knew Charlie wanted his children to have, hence she was the obvious choice for genetics.
All four women were seated now, their arms around each other while people clapped and took photos. I felt a buzz in my pocket, so I silently slipped away. A single woman stood at the front door. I opened it and she threw herself onto me, our lips interlocking for an eternity.
‘I do.’ She panted. On her finger sat a traditional wedding ring, the ones you found before the outbreak of Poly-chromosomal-necrosis, or Poly for short. The fatal virus caused significant organ failure and had reduced the male population by 75 per cent.Even though I might have been the man for four other women, there was only one woman for me. The love of my life was here in front of me, she was my everything. I grabbed my gas mask and we sprinted into the night, hand in hand.
